A Poem: 'Her Eyes'

By Grace Ertel 

Her Eyes 

Something broke. 

I don’t know what. 

Something was different. 

I often stare at her. 

So, I would know. 

She did not admit the rape. 

She did not care to. 

Was she crying for help? 

Or simply wanting, 

Someone to listen. 

I asked what was wrong. 

Did you and he have a fight? 

She stated no we are fine. 

But I knew that was a lie. 

She doesn’t keep stuff. 

We always talk. 

It’s like we share a brain. 

She is always with me. 

Then suddenly, 

As I got up to walk away. 

She turned back. 

I turned back. 

I sat in front of the mirror, 

And told myself, 

This is not okay. 

It is not your fault. 

It is not what you wore. 

You didn’t do anything wrong. 

Yet something broke. 

That night at the party. 

Why do I have this feeling? 

While he gets high-fives 

From all his buddies. 

They thought it was funny. 

Yet, I sit here, broken. 

I stare into the mirror, 

Looking at her. 

I finally know what changed. 

Her eyes, 

My eyes. 

They were shattered into 

A million pieces. 

Waiting to be put back together. 

She knew they’d always 

Be broken, shattered, gone. 

That bright glow she carried, 

A halo in disguise, 

Was gone. 

I thought it was her fault. 

She thought it was mine. 

But really it was his. 

Neither one of us blamed him. 

We both thought it was us, 

We were the problem, 

We are why this happened. 

Even though we know we aren't. 

Yet, my eyes remain broken. 

Her eyes started to water. 

Mine stayed dry. 

As I got up, 

I waved goodbye. 

She looked at me, stuck, broken. 

I am leaving her in the mirror. 

So, no one else will see. 

No one else will know about the rape. 

I will live with this forever, in my head. 

So will she, but I'm leaving it with her. 

He gets off scot free, no one will know.